Chat

Day Thirty Two.

It’s been a week since my last entry. And what a busy week it was…**being sarcastic** Well, it was supposed to be a busy week. I had a tight deadline to meet and no more money to spend. So, I haven’t left the apartment since last Monday.  But the thing is, I wasn’t in the mood to work…again. I kept stopping to rest or to watch anime or play PC games…I just couldn’t work continuously. It’s always been like this for me in all of my previous jobs. At first I’m optimistic and hard-working, then I get tired of the job after a while until I get to the point where I couldn’t focus on my job anymore. I guess, it’s because I don’t really like this kind of job. I’ve never dreamed of having a job where you work in front of the computer everyday. I never wanted to be an IT Professional. But because of a LOT of wrong decisions, I ended up here and I have no choice now. I kept remembering those days when I was a little girl. I was always imagining myself as a famous singer or writer when I grow up. Well, I’m all grown up now, yet I’m nowhere near those dreams. ***Sigh*** I guess, lots of people feels the same way I do. I’m sure there are thousands of people like me who never got to have their dream jobs. Like me, they  dread waking-up every morning because they know they have to spend the whole day doing something they hate and knowing that another day of their lives will be wasted.

So this week, I was supposed to be meeting my deadline. But instead, I played silly Seek-and-Find and PC games, burned anime and dramas into DVDs, researched about a bunch of nonsensical stuff and watching reality shows on TV.  And of course, watching anime is a given! Oh and I also tried to going into an anime chat room.

This might sound really strange, but I’ve never ever been into a chatroom before. I post on different forums all the time but chat rooms are completely unfamiliar territories for me. I guess it’s because I’m really not good when it comes to interacting with people. I know, the people in chat rooms don’t know who I am and they can’t see me but I still feel uncomfortable talking to strangers. As I kept pointing out here, I’m not very good when it comes to conversing with people. And whether it’s talking face to face, on the phone, or in chat rooms, I really suck! The only people I feel comfortable talking to are those that I know really well like close friends and family. I’m even uncomfortable with talking to my boss online. I know, I seriously need a shrink. But of course, no matter how uncomfortable I am in talking to other people, I never let it show on my face. So they have no idea, that my hands are cold as ice and that my heart is pounding while talking to them.

Anyway, so this afternoon, I entered a chat room. Everyone’s talking about all sorts of anime-related stuff. They’re mostly teenagers but some are around my age. They all have their own conversations and I had no idea how to butt-in. But when someone asked for anime recommendations, I grabbed the opportunity and replied. Then I started answering all sorts of random questions they’re typing and I even asked some questions too. But the whole time, everyone ignored everything I say. They seem to know each other really well already and have been chatting for quite some time. So whenever a new person like me comes in, they ignore them. No one acknowledged my answers and no one answered my questions. Others even repeated some of the things that I already said. It’s like they couldn’t even see me there. I felt invisible and out of place. No matter how knowledgeable I am when it comes to all the anime they were talking about, they never cared for what I think. They only listened to those that they already know. And at that moment, I felt the exact same way I always feel whenever my few female friends invite me to parties where I know no one else. People mingle and talk to each other while I stand there invisible and out of place. The only ones who notice me are the annoying guys who wants to hit-on me and the insecure girls who glares at me for unknown reasons. And so, I left the chatroom. I guess, chatting really is not for me. Talking to a group of people is still not my forte, whether they’re in front of me or not.

So let’s just go back to my comfort zone: anime and dramas! I had trouble watching new dramas and anime this week because my internet connection was really really really slow. It took one whole day just to load one episode of Ashita no Kita Yoshio and D.Gray-man. And I often got disconnected half-way! It was really frustrating. I managed to load one episode of Ashita no Kita Yoshio per day but when it comes to anime, I only managed to load one episode of D.Gray-man. And it took me one week to load that single episode because I kept getting disconnected! Waaaaah! And that single episode is still not finished!!!! I was only able to load 95% of it! So the episode I watched was unfinished! But it was still worth it!

After the intense battle between Kanda and Skin, Episode 80 was more light-hearted and funny! I still don’t know if Kanda survived or not though. I didn’t read the manga because I hate spoilers so I guess I’ll just have to keep my fingers crossed! Anyway, this episode is all about Allen and the gang and a little about the Noah clan too! I just love the Noah Clan! They’re just too adorable even though they’re the bad guys. In fact, I don’t think they even consider themselves as the villains. They just have different beliefs, that’s all. Anyway, I was really surprised when they all started crying when they felt that Skin’s dead. It was so heart-warming to see villains cry! They even made a toast in honor of their departed family-member and they talked about how lonely Skin’s life must have been. Awwww, how could you possily hate the  villains if they’re like that!? Oh and Jasdevi are really funny! They’re just so goofy and childish that I just can’t see them as villains! As for Allen and the gang, well, they’re not as funny and adorable as the guys in the Noah clan but it sure was fun seeing Allen re-live his dark childhood memories. His master must have been one seriously twisted guy for him to be that traumatized!

Anyway, I still have 5% of that episode left to watch so I’ll load that episode again tonight. As for Ashita Kita no Yoshio, well, it’s one really weird drama. And somehow I just don’t like Kita Yoshio. He just gives me the creeps. I don’t know why. And his dark side, Negative Yoshio, was downright annoying! I always wanted to punch the screen whenever he comes out. I’m also not sure how I feel about the Yoshio/Shinobu pairing. It’s just too weird. He’s a tiny, timid old man and she’s a pretty, lively young girl.  And she’s young enough to be his daughter! Plus she’s also very childish! So it just doesn’t work for me. I have no problem with big age-differences but the Yoshio and Shinobu pairing is just not right! But as usual, Heita-san (Matsuda  Ryuhei) is the main reason why I’m so hooked with this drama! I’m loving his character more and more with each episode I watch! He’s just such a complex and lovable character. He plans on tricking Yoshio so that he could get his insurance money. He even hired an Assassin to kill Yoshio! But at the same time, he’s always saving Yoshio’s life and often gets him out of any mess he’s in. In fact, he cares too much about the guy! So it’s hard to tell if he’s the good guy or the bad guy! Another character I love in this drama, is Sugimoto-san (Namase Katsuhisa of Gokusen 2)! He’s really funny in Gokusen but I find him more hilarious in this drama. Unlike in Gokusen, he doesn’t have weird hairstyles and exaggerated facial expressions here but he’s never been more hilarious. He has the wittiest lines and quirkiest scenes! I just love everything about his character!

Well, since I could only watch one drama per day because of my slow internet connection, I looked for other ways to pass the time. (Of course, work is not an option) So, I played some PC games. RPGs are out of the question though. If I start playing an RPG, I’d end up playing it non-stop! The last time I played an RPG, I stayed up for four days straight! I didn’t even stop to take a shower and I ate in front of my laptop! I’m that addicted! So nope, I can’t play RPG now or I’d end up being a Zombie for days! So I played Seek-and-Find games…again.

Like I said before, they’re quicker to finish, they stimulate the mind and you still get to play a role. So I like playing them when I’m bored. This week I played two games: “Dream Chronicles 2″ and “Cate West and the Vanishing Files”. Dream Chronicles is probably the shortest and least challenging Seek-and-Find game I’ve ever played but it’s visually stunning and has a nice fantasy theme. The soothing music and beautiful sceneries somehow relaxes me so I love playing it. The story’s pretty typical though. I’ve read loads of fantasy novels with a similar story. But who cares? It’s a game, not a best-selling novel nor a big-budgeted Hollywood movie!

Cate West, on the other hand, is the exact opposite of Dream Chronicles. From fantasy, I moved on to a good old Detective Story. Visually, Cate West is pretty ordinary and I didn’t quite like the style of animation they used. The characters are very dull and two dimensional, and the ending is way too predictable. You’d guess who the villain is right from the start. The graphics are very good though and the crime scenes are quite realistic. But the tasks are way too repetitive and not very challenging. You’d grow bored right away if it weren’t for the “playing detective” part. That is in fact, the only thing that kept me playing. You’d be given certain clues and based on those clues,  you’d have to select which of the suspects to arrest. The clues are very simple and vague so you really have to use your brains to arrest the right guy! It was a very fun and challenging experience. I also learned that I would make a good detective because I always guessed everything correctly on my very first attempt! Aside from the challenging “Crime solving” part, I find the story really interesting. You see, they took a page from Dan Brown’s book and created a story with a Biblical connection. Remember the 3 Magi in the Bible? The three wise men who gave Jesus gifts when he was born in the manger. Well, most people never paid attention to those three guys. But in Cate West, the story revolves around them. Instead of just being three guys who gave Jesus gifts during his birthday, the Three Magi were also given three very important gifts: Truth, Justice and Mind. And they were behind some of the most significant events in human history. They’re like the positive versions of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse! Who would have thought they could be THAT important! And just like in the Da Vincci Code, the Three Magi also have 3 descendants who have their powers. And those three were revealed at the end of the game. Of course, some people might not see that since the ending depends on your score. If you have a high score, you’d get the “Best Ending” but if not, you’d get a different ending. I’m actually thinking of playing it again so that I could see what the “Worse Ending” is like.

Seek-and-Find games only takes a few hours to play so I still ran out of things to do. So I played another game. I found a pre-installed game in my laptop called “Fate”. It looks a bit cheesy and have tiny unpolished-looking characters but I had nothing else to play so I gave it a try. The gameplay’s quite similar to Neverwinter Nights. You have one character, and you go on quests to gain experiences and earn money to upgrade your armors and weapons etc. The only difference is that, Fate’s graphics is similar to that of Final Fantasy VII. So expect your characters to be small with big heads, big eyes and huge hands. The quests are also too easy and almost all the settings look alike. Plus it doesn’t have a story so it’s quite boring but I have nothing else to play so I guess it will have to do. Besides, this game has something other games of its type don’t have: “pets”! Yup! Aside from your character, you also have a pet. Your pet will aid you in your battles and would even carry stuff for you. They could also level-up and transform. You only have two options though. You can either have a cat or a dog. It’s really cool since I’ve never played a game where your only companion is your pet.

Oh well, I guess that’s enough for now. I still have another Ashita no Kita Yoshio episode to load and I’m starting a new anime tonight. It’s called “Vampire Knight”. It’s a shoujo anime but it has the word “Vampire” on its title so I how could I possibly ignore it!?

End of Day Thirty One.